As a Christian woman I feel Blessed. Does that mean that things come easy? No! Does that mean I never make mistakes? No! Does that mean that God is right there beside me through all my struggles and all my goof ups? ABSOLUTLY!
A few weeks ago while camping my hubs and daughter and I watched a movie titled "Moms' Night Out." It was hysterical, we laughed a lot but it also hit home for me. There is a scene where the main character's husband comes home with flowers on Mothers Day to give to his wife, only to find a trail of empty chocolate wrappers leading to their walkin closet. There on the floor of the closet eating chocolate and watching an Eagle Cam is his wife, a crying, tired mess. At that moment in the movie my daughter turns to me and said, "Mom you've never done that have you?" I smiled at her and said "sadly yes more times then I'd like to admit." My daughter said, "but why Mommy your a good mom." I smiled at her and said "I'm glad you think so but just two days ago you said I was the worse mom ever!" That remark seems to come out of most teenagers mouths during those moments when you aren't giving them the answer they are wanting to hear.
Being a mom is hard, being a good mom is a lot harder! And yes I have sought the comfort of a walkin closet to cry, calm myself and gather my composure before going back out to my family after I have felt I've failed them in some particular moment. You can't go to the bathroom....that's the first place they go looking for you! But the closet, no one looks for you in a closet! :)
I've been told that I am a good mom. But in all honesty there's times when I feel I fall short. Why do I feel this way? And I know I'm not the only mom who feels this way. Friends and family members have made the same remarks to me that they feel they aren't as good of moms as they think they could be. Why are we so hard on ourselves? Are we expecting ourselves to be perfection? My three children are happy, healthy and carving their way in the world. The boys have families of their own raising their children (and doing a great job at it) and they both have wonderful wives. I AM Blessed to be able to see their successes, I AM Blessed that we all enjoy getting together, I AM Blessed to feel the love and family unity I feel when we are all together, but I KNOW this! Yet I still feel like I've not been the best mom I could be. I guess I should heed my own advice. I recently had a conversation with a single mother, she is a hard working amazing mother! But she was beating herself up, I told her that she is doing a lot more things right than she was giving herself credit for, she was being to hard on her self. I tried to help her look at all the positive things she was doing for her child.
I was told a long time ago by my Pastor's wife that raising children was "a hope and a prayer." There is so much truth in that statement! I have repeated that statement to several moms I've had indepth discussions about parenting with. I just need to keep reminding myself of that same statement.....I hope to strive to be an "excellent" mother and I pray that God gives me the "perfection" to do it well! And I think my mom friends and I need to plan an occasional "Moms' Night Out" because us Moms really do need to stick together and support each other. It really IS the hardest and most important job we will ever do! And I plan on sharing that movie with all my mom friends too!
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